WHY

Tell me why

Why

Whyy

Whyyyy

Do I always have critters around me?

Yes I’m starting to think that I’m being stalked by them. I have found spiders, baby centipedes and small ants with HUGE heads on my carpet. Isn’t it enough that I have possums screaming blue murder while running up and down my roof at night?

When I first started living here, I was witness to a buggy massacre every single night. Three HUGE lizards (let’s call them Emmanuel, Charlie and Wilson) will be chilling on the outside of my window eating up whatever moths that were stupid enough to fly close by. I admit, the moths’ deaths were my fault. I am a geek so I work late at my desk. When I work late, I leave the lamp on. Moths are attracted to light right?

Emmanuel is the one who goes all tense when he is about to pounce on his prey. And when he does that, his tail goes into a vibrating tizzy. That’s how I tell him apart from Charlie and Wilson. Those two are the ultimate chillers man. They act all nonchalant and then… POW!!! Bye bye moth.

Within a month, I killed a spider, a grasshopper (it fell on my head, it deserved to die) and a cockroach. This Monday I nearly stepped on a spider that was the size of an Aussie 50 cent coin. I decided to spare it but it found its way into my housemate’s room instead and got killed anyway.

On Tuesday I found a baby centipede on my carpet. Thank god I didn’t step on it. I flushed it down the toilet.

Yesterday, I found an ant with a normal-sized body and a kickass head on the carpet again. How does it even manage to walk?

Anyways it died. I killed it.